Is it better to be male or female?

[Sonic#]

class doesn't have to do with sex... or economics... there are many unclassy rich women and men

Class has a lot to do with sex,
and even more to do with economics,
which is why they call them
social classes.

I'm pointing out that you're discriminating
and your discrimination fits in well with the history of the term.

[Yuki]

...

words have multiple meanings...

...you don't have to be rich to behave with class

No, see, you're not communicating. We're not "assuming things" about you, except that you're either incapable of or refusing to respond to our points/questions. Because you're not. You just keep typing sentences including the word "classy."

you... are refusing to go back... and see where i already described class

why did you pick your husband over other men?

I should think that obvious from what I wrote about him.

...you guys are having it both ways...

why should i go back... and find what's implicit... when you aren't finding what's explicit?

your husband is sensitive... and doesnt stand up for himself

that says nothing... about him... versus other men

[anonymousrabbit]

words have multiple meanings...

So then help us out and explain using other words what you mean when you say "to behave with class".

[rowan]

your husband is sensitive... and doesnt stand up for himself

Who says he doesn't stand up for himself? Against whom? Me? As I said we come to our decisions jointly because we are a partnership. That means we discuss them, using something called "reason" (look it up) and then we make our decisions based on what's best for us.

[Yuki]

your husband is sensitive... and doesnt stand up for himself

Who says he doesn't stand up for himself? Against whom? Me? As I said we come to our decisions jointly because we are a partnership. That means we discuss them, using something called "reason" (look it up) and then we make our decisions based on what's best for us.

you said...

"But you have to stand up for yourself, and I'd argue that doing so is definitely classy. My husband is not."

[Storage and Disposal]

You're taking that out of context. I read her post to mean that her husband wasn't confrontational. That doesn't mean he won't stand up for himself.

[anonymousrabbit]

"But you have to stand up for yourself, and I'd argue that doing so is definitely classy. My husband is not."

No, if you go back and see what she actually wrote, Rowan said

I'm very confrontational . . . My husband is not.

That doesn't mean he can't/won't stand up for himself.

[Storage and Disposal]

^Jinx!

[Yuki]

You're taking that out of context. I read her post to mean that her husband wasn't confrontational. That doesn't mean he won't stand up for himself.

what's the difference?

[Sonic#]

words have multiple meanings...

You say to the person
who studies words
for a living.

I describe how you are using class,
not what class could mean.

I would hope that someone
who recognizes that words have multiple meanings
would be okay with genders
having multiple meanings.

I'm still offended.
I don't want to be classy.
And I don't think I'm a bad person
if I'm not classy.

[drunken dragon]

Confrontational = seeking out fights
Standing up for yourself = admirable, awesome, brave, cool, necessary

Don't tell me I'm not reading back. You're not saying anything of substance.

[Yuki]

words have multiple meanings...

You say to the person
who studies words
for a living.

I describe how you are using class,
not what class could mean.

I would hope that someone
who recognizes that words have multiple meanings
would be okay with genders
having multiple meanings.

I'm still offended.
I don't want to be classy.
And I don't think I'm a bad person
if I'm not classy.

i never called you a bad person...

you don't want to be classy... so what?

[Sonic#]

You're using a value judgment that's unfair.

Within that value system, I am a bad person.

Furthermore, your tone here:

your husband sounds... submissive... and lucky... to find you

is really condescending. Like rowan's husband, I'm a man. I'm not terribly confrontational in person. According to you, I'm submissive and lucky to find someone who loves me. That's bullshit.

That's so what.

[cwbyrvr]

Yuki, you may never have explicitly stated that men and women should behave a certain way, but your constant generalizations about what men and women are like indicate that you believe they do and that they should.

i said men should stop fighting... not keep doing... what they do

can you stop assuming things about me?

You're still doing it. You're still implying that all men are one and the same. Please stop generalizing if you don't wish to be misinterpreted.

[Yuki]

You're using a value judgment that's unfair.

Within that value system, I am a bad person.

Furthermore, your tone here:

your husband sounds... submissive... and lucky... to find you

is really condescending. Like rowan's husband, I'm a man. I'm not terribly confrontational in person. According to you, I'm submissive and lucky to find someone who loves me. That's bullshit.

That's so what.

i'm... unsure what value judgment you're referring to

as for being a man... i'm sorry... but that's how the world seems to me... men are expected to fight

luck does not define good or badness though

[drunken dragon]

Ohmygod, I'm out. Foe'd, because you don't seem to understand English, or how forums for discussion work.

[Sonic#]

Yuki, calling someone "classy" or "unclassy" is a value judgment.

By calling me lucky, you imply that most people wouldn't want me. So by not being classy, you say that I am not popular, that most people won't like me.

[Yuki]

Yuki, calling someone "classy" or "unclassy" is a value judgment.

By calling me lucky, you imply that most people wouldn't want me. So by not being classy, you say that I am not popular, that most people won't like me.

ok... so you're unclassy... but that doesn't mean you're bad

popularity has nothing to do with being bad either

there are lots of character traits...

http://character-in-action.com/list-of- ... er-traits/

men aren't expected to be classy anyway... classy men are looked at as exceptional

there are few gentlemen in today's age...

[great girl wonder]

Yuki the way that you write leaves the reader no choice but to make educated assumptions about what you are trying(not very well) to communicate. Maybe if you try to write full sentences we might be able to better understand the meanings of the words you are using. You are either using words incorrectly which is fine, that's how you learn and we need more context to understand what you actually mean to say. Or you are trying to confuse people.

[Momo21]

ok... so you're unclassy... but that doesn't mean you're bad

Yuki, you can't just call people classy or unclassy willy nilly, that's being rude and it hurts peoples feelings.
Also, are you thinking when you do '...'? Because instead of doing the triple dot thing you can just...you know, pause and think in your head. The triple dot (someone said what they're really called but I forgot), anyway the triple dot is usually used for suspense or etc, but the way you're using it, is kind of annoying...

[lillerina]

I think that really ellipses are meant to be used when quoting and missing out words. They're used to indicate pauses, suspense, etc, but the grammatically correct use for them is to indicate that you skipped a bit when quoting.

[Wes]

Posting in an illiterate or thickest troll ever thread.

[Yuki]

Yuki, you can't just call people classy or unclassy willy nilly, that's being rude and it hurts peoples feelings.
Also, are you thinking when you do '...'? Because instead of doing the triple dot thing you can just...you know, pause and think in your head. The triple dot (someone said what they're really called but I forgot), anyway the triple dot is usually used for suspense or etc, but the way you're using it, is kind of annoying...

if everyone worried... about other's feelings... all the time... nobody could ever do anything... everything can be offensive

it's not your right... to section off someone else's mind... just because you don't like it

They're used to indicate pauses

yes... i write with ellipses... to show... how i'm thinking...

...they let you know... when i pause in my own head... maybe that shows... how what i say... can be interpreted in many ways

fluid thinking doesn't... come easy to everyone

[Sonic#]

We don't need to know when you pause in your head. Your statements can be interpreted in many ways without the ellipses. Good writing can be interpreted in several ways while still communicating ideas that can be understood.

Clarity does not mean hammering things down to a single interpretation. It means giving enough focus to your writing that we can see those interpretations which are most relevant to the conversation. Your thinking isn't fluid; it's stuck in elliptical mud. There aren't many interpretations to your writing - there are none, at least none that are focused enough to engage with in even fluid conversation. They're stuck under the mud.

[rowan]

I think that really ellipses are meant to be used when quoting and missing out words.

Technically, but I also think that language is fluid and the use of the ellipse has changed over time to also include a pause, but specifically the kind of pause that offsets the next bit. I think technically this would be done with a long dash, but those are harder to do in internet writing without inserting the html code.