I've enjoyed being pregnant these past seven months, I've been healthy, surrounded by support, it's a fun adventure, etc.
but other times I just wish I could ESCAPE.
I'm cool now but I was cool before this too, and a lot of those ways are vanishing. I'm not skinny anymore, I can't embrace my love of fine wines or roller coasters, in two weeks I won't even be able to fly airplanes. Seeing these things go is tough. And the world around me sometimes just epic-fails when it comes to helping me deal with the changes.
So I would appreciate it if the world would stop:
1) Addressing me as "preggo" or "mama"... It was cute at first but every so often I'd like to hear my name, to remind me it's still there.
2) Relaying traumatic childbirth stories. Especially if they're friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend (I can find all sorts of crazy stories if I dig out seven levels of separation, folks). Especially if I'm reading up on natural birth. Just FYI... if a woman WANTS a natural birth, she should be allowed to have it. Telling her "don't feel bad when you ask for the epidural!" is like telling your kid "don't feel bad when you lose the soccer game!" or telling newlyweds "don't feel bad when you get a divorce!" I mean statistically, you're preparing them, right? NO PEOPLE IT'S NOT NICE. A lot of women who want a natural birth get one, and they're not "magic women", there's a little luck involved but it's mostly determination and prep work. I've talked to them, and not a single one has said "Well childbirth was just so super easy for me".
3) Commenting on my size. I've always had this, I've always been really tall, and when lots of people point it out I feel like a freak. But when you're pregnant there's a whole other level of people asking how far along you are, then telling you their opinion on whether or not you look like it. Stop looking at me. On days when I feel beautiful I just want to feel beautiful. On days when I feel like a beached whale I just want to feel like a beached whale.
4) Ignoring other things going on in my life. I'm doing a lot of interesting things right now besides incubating, which doesn't really take up much time or effort, it pretty much happens on its own. No I'm not "ready for this baby yet", I'm two months away, why would I spend every weekend setting up the nursery?
What should you do? Ask me what's going on in my life, and if I don't bring up pregnancy don't change the subject to pregnancy. Tell me I picked out some nice clothes today... it takes a lot of effort, I'm wearing things to work I NEVER would have worn to work, let me know it's okay. Let me know I'm fabulous, pregnancy is fabulous, childbirth is empowering and I am the same strong woman I've always been. Offer to buy me a beer when this is all over. Let me know there will still be a group camping trip that I can go on in September. Remind me that my life is still mine.
That's all. Carry on.