Spacefem's Weekly Useless Poetry Contest
Welcome to the useless poetry contest! Every week, we post a new and very unique theme and invite all our loyal visitors to submit their inspirations based on it! After ten days, we vote on who composed the coolest, most original, or most amusing peice. So if you think this page is stupid today, come back next week, it'll be a new, different kind of stupid!
Help pick our next contest!
New contests are picked by our loyal viewers, so every once in a while we'll want to know what you think. What are you dying to write poetry about?
The Contests
These change every ten days, so visit often!
Contest #199 : Vacant Stocking Caps ()Contest #198 : Pulchritudinous Mathematicians Fabricate Blockades ()Contest #197 : Administer Crayons ()Poems of the Moment
These are the newest poems. You can also see the all time winners or vote for your favorites!scratch and smile
pondering the flash
of the latest dslr
sick of all the trash
talk about the car
Constellating the latest
installing the greatest
radio into the volt
so it could always bolt
when it's driver got the itch
the gps directing one into the ditch
it was time to fix the glitch
putting cream on arm,
rolling down the window
losing all the dating charm
as the passenger avoided
any touch...
this was not the commercial
to air, but another with lack
of hair
could grace the scene
with the detroit flair
without the itch
and without the chocolate
it's all a lot kinder
without
Vote for your favorite |
Submit your own swordfight with kitties
those cats creep in my veg patch,
they really are quite bad,
i zap them with my best match,
but this only makes them glad,
they love to fight with weapons,
guns and ammo and knives,
but what they dont know is i have napalm,
from that they won't survive.
Vote for your favorite |
Submit your own Donut Why Must Thy Cry?
Running towards sprinkles.
Wrapping the doughy exuberance into a passionate embrace.
But it was too soon.
Premature jogging it twas.
My bony finger took the innocense of one unfortunate doughtnut.
It cried and it begged.
But the glazed center said 'aye aye let's jog'.
And that it how, the donut became an edible prostitute.
Vote for your favorite |
Submit your own Other Stuff You'd Like To Know
Here's how it works:
- Every week, we announce a new random, useless phrase to serve as the theme for your poetry.
- You have ten days to submit new poetry based on that phrase.
- Before the two week date, our staff approves all entries (you'll be notified of approval if you provide an e-mail address)
- After ten days, the contest will be officially closed to new submissions and voting can begin.
- You will be able to track votes throughout the contest. If you provide an e-mail address, we will e-mail you when the contest starts.
- If you win, you can feel good about yourself. That's really all you can do because there aren't prizes or anything, but we think feeling good is worth something.
- Winners will be posted on the winners page, with links to their websites.
Poetry rules:
- We accept any format. It doesn't have to rhyme. It doesn't have to make sense.
- The poem should be losely based on the theme presented for the week.
- The entire poem must be original, except for allowable incorporation of the theme phrase.
- Poetry can not be unreasonably vulgar. Bad words are okay, but we reserve the right to reject anything we feel is over the top, for any reason.
- The name and website associated with the artwork must be personal, not commercial, in nature, unless it's commercial in that cool indy designer kind of way. What I'm saying is, if your real name is "FreeOnlineCasino", we'd recommend leaving the name field blank.
All submissions must be submitted and approved before the contest starts. We have the right to deny entry to any submission, for any reason. You can submit as many entries as you want, but if they start to look the same or if we feel like you're overloading the contest, we can stop approving them.