Thoughts on possessing a uterus

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Neko
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Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by Neko » Wed Aug 21, 0:46 2013

Not, like, spooky, "DEMONS OUT!" possession. But, you know, having one.

A side effect of a medication (not birth control) that I'm on actually prevents me from menstruating. It wasn't until that stopped that I really thought about what a chore it is for me to deal with. I never really had an opinion on it before, it was just something that happened to me. It's made me realize that I don't really care for having a uterus.

What further drove that home was my boyfriend's sister calling us selfish for not making babies we don't want to have. I knew people thought that way but all of the stupid falling from her mouth kind of blind-sided me into silence. I know I don't need to explain my reproductive decisions here, that whole topic has been discussed in past threads. Basic feminism and all.

Honestly though... I kind of feel bad for not wanting to have a uterus since there are people out there who wish they had one, as well as people who want children but can't have them through the usual means. I don't feel like a woman just by having it, I don't identify with it, it just sort of takes up basement space and makes a mess once a month. Err, well, it used to. If it wouldn't screw with me hormonally I would be fine with removing it. My gender identity really wouldn't change and if my mind changed later about having kids, well, that's where adoption would come in.

Most of all, I'm simply tired of other people defining me by it and judging me for not plugging in my Not-So-EZ Bake Oven.

Got any thoughts about your bits, uterus or otherwise?
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by rowan » Wed Aug 21, 9:16 2013

I could do without mine, frankly, it causes my migraines. Though it turns out that getting rid of those bits probably would cause way more complications and bad things than migraines (I've asked my doc, actually) and doing the tying the tubes things doesn't affect the hormones (which is what causes the migraines).

I don't get judged much about my child decisions, though sometimes I still do. It doesn't matter what your decision is you always get judged. No kids? Judge! Only one kid? Judge (I get this one). Lots of kids? Judge! Maybe people with only two kids don't get judged because that's what "the average" is? But I'm sure they still get judged sometimes anyway.

Meh.

Don't feel guilty about not wanting yours.
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by lovernotafighter » Wed Aug 21, 18:19 2013

Well, I may have exhausted this topic before, but I'm pretty sure that I don't want children and getting my monthly period is actually bad for me in some ways. So, I'm not sure that I love having a uterus a whole lot. I'm not sure how I would really feel if I didn't have it. Would love to hear other opinions from anyone.
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by jubalsquirrelly » Wed Aug 21, 21:37 2013

I hates it when people use pseudo virtue.

"No babies is selfish" just what the hell makes not inflicting pain on oneself (raising a baby) a vice?

Is it because the act is done for your own benefit?

So when I eat its immoral?


I heard Limbaugh rambling about virtue on the radio today while changing channels.

When this happens please demand from your critics to know what makes a vice and a virtue.

Then watch them collapse into either general buffoonery or a half baked consequentialism specifically designed to save the bolted on "virtue." :mad:

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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by great girl wonder » Wed Aug 21, 22:33 2013

I also find my uterus useless. I've consulted a doctor about removal since I have endometriosis but some of the side effects and the lack of support for the vagina worries me. I'd rather cope with pain and mood swings than risk a prolapsed vagina. Clearly I value my sex life more than my daily comfort.

Maybe we should organize some sort of uterus exchange program. Then people that really desire all the fun of being an uterus owner could have all the joy they want!
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by lillerina » Thu Aug 22, 0:53 2013

We could give a uterus to every person who doesn't have one but does have the uncontrollable urge to tell people what to do with theirs. 'Hey, Mr Texas Lawmaker, Mr Ohio Lawmaker, here's your uterus. Now remember, what you do with it isn't up to you!'
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by octarineoboe » Thu Aug 22, 7:50 2013

^ There was, last year, a movement to knit/crochet uteruses and send them to Virginia legislators. (Here's a Mother Jones article about it.) Doesn't quite give them all the joy of cramps and PMS and potential pregnancy, but is certainly a fun idea!

I haven't really given much thought to my uterus. Its potential for pregnancy scares me right now, but I might want to use that potential in the future. So I'd like to keep it, but it definitely doesn't define me or my gender identity, and I do my best not to associate with people who judge me that way.

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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by Rainbow Dolphins » Mon Aug 26, 16:04 2013

You know, I don't know how I feel about this. When I think about it, I really try to be positive and love all my body parts, including the ones that don't work properly (I have a bum knee and some back problems). So, even though my uterus does cause me some grief, I try to love it just the same as the rest of me. Yesterday I was having some kind of nasty cramps and I sat down and was saying "please uterus be a happy uterus..." to my abdomen, so it's not that I want to get rid of it, I just wish it would stop hurting me!

I actually really don't think I want children, but I still want to keep my uterus. Besides, I am really quite fond of my vulva and I try to keep in mind the interconnectedness of my reproductive system, and the fact that removing my ovaries or my uterus would affect the whole system in a negative way. Actually, I would be a lot more open to getting rid of my ovaries than my uterus, I don't feel too attached to them. I get the worst cramps around my back where my ovaries are, and if they weren't there to ovulate my uterus would no longer pose a threat of pregnancy, so I'd be pretty OK with it.

Also, I really hate that part of the gyno exam where the doctor sticks their finger in your vagina and locates your uterus and ovaries. Especially since the last gyno I had seemed like she was really bad at it and after about 5 seconds I wanted to yell '"bitch get your hand out of my vagina!" And the uterus always seems like it's easier for them to find than the ovaries so I would have to suffer a stranger's finger in my twat for a shorter amount of time.
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by Tweek » Wed Aug 28, 0:35 2013

I don't have one as I'm a boy. I don't see what business it is of anybody what you do with yours; there are plenty of people in the world; humanity won't disappear if you don't make babies.
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by Meperidine » Wed Aug 28, 18:26 2013

I talk calmingly to my uterus sometimes, same as RD was saying. Any thought or idea of being pregnant really disturbs or grosses me out, and I know it's just waiting to spring back into action if I ever choose to go off the pill. For now, being on the pill means no ovulating, and enough menses to have a comfortable reminder i'm not knocked up but not enough to cause a lot of distress. I'd probably miss it if it were gone because it's connected to the rest of my bits? but I'm not at all sure of that.
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Re: Thoughts on possessing a uterus

Post by lillerina » Thu Aug 29, 0:38 2013

My uterus and I are on much better terms since I got a copper IUD. I know a lot of people have heavier, more painful periods, but I'm having pain-free periods for the first time in my whole life. I like to think that getting a piece of plastic and copper put in it scared my uterus into being less horrible.
If I bang my head against a brick wall five times and get five lumps, why am I surprised when I bang it a sixth time and get a sixth lump?

"Isn't it funny that the only time your race or gender is questioned is when you're not a white man?" - Wanda Sykes

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