On to week 1 -->
You're not pregnant yet! So I might as well use this as a general introduction to my weekly blog.
When I was pregnant I loved having something to read every week, I followed a number of weekly blogs and calendars. After my pregnancy I wanted to write my own, sort of "give back" to the world, but wasn't sure I had anything new to say. So I made a list of wikipedia articles to go with my daily pregnancy calendar. They were all just interesting topics about pregnancy, childbirth, and babies that I thought pregnant people might want to know about.
Looking at the list, I changed my mind about having nothing new to say. I did want to add commentary about why I chose the articles I chose, and add some personal stories to back up what was here. So you've got the blog!
Some paragraphs are plagarized from my livejournal from when I was pregnant. Some were written after I was pregnant, looking back on everything. And some aren't written by me at all, I love guest bloggers who know more about certain topics! If you have something big to share, too big for just a plain old comment, e-mail me and I'll add your story to a week! There are over 40, after all, so plenty to go around.
This blog is a little bit crunchy. I did yoga throughout my pregnancy, had a natural birth, I breastfeed, we cosleep sometimes when we feel like it. But not totally crunchy: it was still a hospital birth, we went with disposable diapers, we only cosleep when we feel like it. Throughout the blog I explain in little bits at a time why I made the choices I did. It's just one pregnant woman's perspective.
I hope this helps someone out, and is at least a little entertaining. Congratulations on being pregnant! You can say what you want, but everyone in the universe agrees there's nothing else like it. It's weird, it's magical, it's only nine months. Good luck!
Hospital one thought I was a drug seeker as I was so pale, clammy and skinny apart from the belly bloat. They didn't even draw blood or do a urine test, and the male doctor refused to help at all, and told us there was nothing wrong. Thank god for my husband and the fact no cops were around to give us a speeding fine, we made the dash in record time and I imagine if we had been pulled over we would have hada police escort to the hospital anyway.
I guess I could look for other pregnancy forums but spacefem is my happy place and even though we're not as active as we used to be, honestly this is where I feel most comfortable posting. My mum and mil aren't being supportive and the other day my mother in law actually grabbed me by the neck and wrenched my head to tell me to calm down, when I was already as calm as possible. She made it so much worse. The night the rupture happened my sister told me and husband we couldn't stay at her house overnight in the city, so we drove 5 hours home back to our house in the bush with me jumping out of the car to piss and bleed chunks out every now and then. When she found out about the loss, she tried sucking up but it was so god damned obvious she was just trying to absolve her guilt.
You can continue discussing with him the difference of a boy and a girl. Have him socialize too with the same gender. There's nothing wrong if you have go with opposite sex as long as he understands what/who he is.
So do you feel hanging out with the opposite gender at a young age can confuse a person's gender identity?
If a boy who has a penis asks if he's a boy and you don't just say yes, then that's straight up lunacy.
What he decides to do with that boyhood or how he dresses is up to him. But if you're born with a penis you're a boy.
Making it airy fairy when, statistically, scientifically, less than 1% of 1% of children born have true gender dysphoria, is immoral and wrong. It's also a sign of our troubled times.
This is just my anecdotal experience but...
I have experienced bullying based on simply engaging in normal children's play with girls. Insults were attacks on both me and the girls. But I NEVER questioned my gender as a male. So if a child asks me if he's a boy and was identified biologically as one, I am going to question what influences are on the child before I answer.
Aum, my partner and I were just discussing this. He was surprised by my taking the hard line that stopping BC or poking holes in condoms or something like that is rape, making the woman a rapist. Which should result in jail time, so she should lose custody, which should go to the father and now he has the choice of keeping the baby or putting them up for adoption.
It's unfortunate that you can't prove such a thing, but hopefully if it was actually taken seriously women would be less likely to do it because it would at least be explicitly called rape.
I understand how the justice system and the family courts would look at it. They see it as the man's sperm made it to the egg so somehow he wasn't protecting himself, he made the choice, yada yada. There's no way to prove that the woman was manipulative, withdrew BC, or "poked holes in the condom" (I think that's unheard of, but anyway).
I found this article (
The findings suggest that solo motherhood, in itself, does not result in psychological problems for children.
The lit review at the beginning of the article adds some specificity here. What seems hard on kids is not single parenthood itself; it's often the divorce that results in a single parent being involved.
Then there are people who become single parents, but not by choice. That's also rough, often because these parents lack the financial stability and stability to do well. So the article is really looking at
These studies have consistently shown that children whose parents divorce are more likely to show emotional and behavioral problems than are children in intact families (Amato, 2000, 2001, 2005; Coleman & Glenn, 2009; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, 1999; Pryor & Rodgers, 2001). However, the children’s difficulties appear to be largely associated with aspects of the divorce, rather than single-parenthood, in itself. single parents by choice
Not having read your post, but just the heading, my response was "wine." But after reading your post, I thought "wine."
Yes. After bedtime.
Also, honestly the only way we made it through was we would take turns being the center of focus. We still do this, divide and conquer (and she's only one kid, hell). Also, I know people are like really limit screen time BUT if you really need to get something done one episode of e.g. Daniel Tiger or Paw Patrol or whatever isn't gonna be too bad. I think DarkOne has some good ideas too.
I am still dealing with the fact that your 11 year old is an actual 11 year old.
egg freezing seems like a good option esp if you have extra time and money.
but I take them to restaurants so I know they end up hating 90% of the things they ask for.
- kid would like a sibling
- maybe people are right about end of life stuff
That's about it. I hated being pregnant, the last time I was pregnant the hormones were... really awful. Plus kid is now pretty big so another one would be weird and we gave away all our stuff.
I had an appointment with the obgyn today. He seems to think I'm even farther along than he originally thought. I didn't have an ultrasound. He just went by the size of my uterus. It's well over my belly button now. He's sending me to a high risk Dr. Asap and then I'm suppost to see him again on the 29th. By then he said they will have a better idea as to how far along I actually am. So far the pregnancy is going well. I did have complications with my first one and went to a specialist but this time I'm being referred to one because I'm old lol. They automatically send women when they are 35 and older.