<-- Back to week 16 | On to week 18 -->
Quickening is feeling the baby move.
Take my advice and don't obsess with the "was that it? was that not it?" because trust me, nothing good comes from the wondering! At 17 weeks your baby could still fit in the palm of your hand - maybe you can feel it, but you'll never be sure.
This is another one of those topics where movie pregancy will be totally different from real pregnancy. In movie pregnancy, a woman is walking around innocently when she suddenly exclaims, "A kick!" and puts her hand on her stomach in the exact place the kick happened. And everybody else gets to see it too! I saw an episode of "Grey's Anatomy", a medical show no less, where the barely pregnant Dr. Grey feels a faint movement that everyone else has to tell her is the baby. Then the next scene is her sitting in bed with her husband that night, he has his hand on her flat belly and they're rejoicing in all these dinosaur-size kicks and punches.
It took me weeks to tell that the movements I was feeling were actually a baby, and even then it wasn't kicks, it was the big movements, like when she rolled over like a floppy fish. That was at like 22 weeks? So all this talk about people feeling movements at 12 or 14 weeks... I blame the movie pregnancies. I thought I felt something at 14 weeks but who knows? And who cares? It's so much more fun when it's obvious, so just wait until then. If you say you're feeling movements everybody will want to annoy you by touching your belly anyway.
Late in pregnancy, like 33 weeks, it gets really fun. You can tell when a foot or bottom is sticking out, poke at it, it'll MOVE, everybody can see. You can play "screw with your baby" before she's even born. That's wholesome fun that you get to look forward to.
And then just to add weirdness, for weeks after your baby is born, you can feel phantom kicks. No one can explain it. You know there's no baby in there. But you're so used to feeling it, you swear something is happening. It's like laying in bed after spending a day on a boat and feeling like the earth is swaying beneath you - it doesn't just stop. Baby movements become such a part of your brain that they don't go away, even when you're holding your newborn and they're touching you only from the outside.
My father-in-law spends a lot of time with the kid, mostly by choice. I sometimes wish we had more of a schedule, because at the moment, naps and bedtime are the only semi-guaranteed breaks for anyone. My spouse and father-in-law both work from home free-lance, so they don't actually have a schedule for when they need to be left alone, but at least my father-in-law has more warning with jobs scheduled out in advance.
I'm sorry for your loss. Ectopic pregnancies are scary, and I would like to go punch that first doctor in the face for you.
PPD is awful too.
When I worked in a biligual Kita, the kids picked up loads from simply being read to and pointing out the different things. Sometimes a question came up ("that is a pferd", "it's called horse in English", "ok horse") and it's good to know both languages to understand what the kid is saying, but reading is a good together activity
I would say its very important, because what you learn shapes and molds yours views that make you who you are.
Aum, my partner and I were just discussing this. He was surprised by my taking the hard line that stopping BC or poking holes in condoms or something like that is rape, making the woman a rapist. Which should result in jail time, so she should lose custody, which should go to the father and now he has the choice of keeping the baby or putting them up for adoption.
It's unfortunate that you can't prove such a thing, but hopefully if it was actually taken seriously women would be less likely to do it because it would at least be explicitly called rape.
I understand how the justice system and the family courts would look at it. They see it as the man's sperm made it to the egg so somehow he wasn't protecting himself, he made the choice, yada yada. There's no way to prove that the woman was manipulative, withdrew BC, or "poked holes in the condom" (I think that's unheard of, but anyway).
I topped baby off tonight. He straight up drank 7 ounces of formula after his prunes. If he's an infiltrator, he's eating well for it.
I am still dealing with the fact that your 11 year old is an actual 11 year old.
If a boy who has a penis asks if he's a boy and you don't just say yes, then that's straight up lunacy.
What he decides to do with that boyhood or how he dresses is up to him. But if you're born with a penis you're a boy.
Making it airy fairy when, statistically, scientifically, less than 1% of 1% of children born have true gender dysphoria, is immoral and wrong. It's also a sign of our troubled times.
This is just my anecdotal experience but...
I have experienced bullying based on simply engaging in normal children's play with girls. Insults were attacks on both me and the girls. But I NEVER questioned my gender as a male. So if a child asks me if he's a boy and was identified biologically as one, I am going to question what influences are on the child before I answer.