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There's something oddly fun about this time of pregnancy. I have a feeling I've got about two more weeks, first babies being late so often and all, and it's funny to see the look on people's faces when they ask my due date and I say "Oh not until next Friday." The man & I are savoring these last few days of independent childless married coupledom. I've had a nice healthy pregnancy and want to keep appreciating it, one day at a time.
Without a ton to talk about, I'm going to throw in some random baby stuff info.
We did not use a baby monitor because our house is not that big, and our daughter is incredibly loud. We own one, a cheap one, like $20. I used it to sit out on the porch one day and read while she napped. But to be honest even that felt a little weird.
We did not child proof our house while I was pregnant. We went the crazy route... just let the baby roam around and childproof based on what she liked to get into. Which, by six months, was everything.
We did do some babywearing! I tried a number of products... we had a cheap Infantino baby carrier from Target that I didn't like, but it fit my large husband. We had a baby bjorn I got on ebay that was very comfortable, I could roam around an art fair for two hours with my 16 pound chunk of a bug and barely just start to feel sore. The baby sling lasted even longer (weight-wise) than that. I borrowed it from a friend. The brand was NoJo, which is funny because my daughter Jo still worked just fine in it.
Babywearing was great when she was a month old and super fussy because she'd calm down and I had two hands free to make a sandwich. It takes up a lot less room when you're out in public than a stroller. It feels secure and happy.
I topped baby off tonight. He straight up drank 7 ounces of formula after his prunes. If he's an infiltrator, he's eating well for it.
I am still dealing with the fact that your 11 year old is an actual 11 year old.
My father-in-law spends a lot of time with the kid, mostly by choice. I sometimes wish we had more of a schedule, because at the moment, naps and bedtime are the only semi-guaranteed breaks for anyone. My spouse and father-in-law both work from home free-lance, so they don't actually have a schedule for when they need to be left alone, but at least my father-in-law has more warning with jobs scheduled out in advance.
I'm sorry for your loss. Ectopic pregnancies are scary, and I would like to go punch that first doctor in the face for you.
PPD is awful too.
You can continue discussing with him the difference of a boy and a girl. Have him socialize too with the same gender. There's nothing wrong if you have go with opposite sex as long as he understands what/who he is.
So do you feel hanging out with the opposite gender at a young age can confuse a person's gender identity?
If a boy who has a penis asks if he's a boy and you don't just say yes, then that's straight up lunacy.
What he decides to do with that boyhood or how he dresses is up to him. But if you're born with a penis you're a boy.
Making it airy fairy when, statistically, scientifically, less than 1% of 1% of children born have true gender dysphoria, is immoral and wrong. It's also a sign of our troubled times.
This is just my anecdotal experience but...
I have experienced bullying based on simply engaging in normal children's play with girls. Insults were attacks on both me and the girls. But I NEVER questioned my gender as a male. So if a child asks me if he's a boy and was identified biologically as one, I am going to question what influences are on the child before I answer.
I would say its very important, because what you learn shapes and molds yours views that make you who you are.
Aum, my partner and I were just discussing this. He was surprised by my taking the hard line that stopping BC or poking holes in condoms or something like that is rape, making the woman a rapist. Which should result in jail time, so she should lose custody, which should go to the father and now he has the choice of keeping the baby or putting them up for adoption.
It's unfortunate that you can't prove such a thing, but hopefully if it was actually taken seriously women would be less likely to do it because it would at least be explicitly called rape.
I understand how the justice system and the family courts would look at it. They see it as the man's sperm made it to the egg so somehow he wasn't protecting himself, he made the choice, yada yada. There's no way to prove that the woman was manipulative, withdrew BC, or "poked holes in the condom" (I think that's unheard of, but anyway).
I found this article (
The findings suggest that solo motherhood, in itself, does not result in psychological problems for children.
The lit review at the beginning of the article adds some specificity here. What seems hard on kids is not single parenthood itself; it's often the divorce that results in a single parent being involved.
Then there are people who become single parents, but not by choice. That's also rough, often because these parents lack the financial stability and stability to do well. So the article is really looking at
These studies have consistently shown that children whose parents divorce are more likely to show emotional and behavioral problems than are children in intact families (Amato, 2000, 2001, 2005; Coleman & Glenn, 2009; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, 1999; Pryor & Rodgers, 2001). However, the children’s difficulties appear to be largely associated with aspects of the divorce, rather than single-parenthood, in itself. single parents by choice